We’re often asked how to share Gathering Hope with someone else or invite them to our annual gathering. They know that their loved one could benefit from a place where they’d be supported, but might be intimidated about suggesting it. We asked the best resource we have...our moms. Whether you’ve experienced loss for yourself or not, you’ll find what you need below:

“I was invited a couple of times, but someone saying ‘Let’s go together, I want to remember your baby with you,’ cinched it for me. Grieving mommas need this kind of support and often don’t know where to find it or don’t know that it’s normal to need support. Reaching out can be scary but you’re throwing them a lifeline.”

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“A friend connected me.

I think most people want to be invited even if they feel they aren’t ready to go to something. Being invited to something, even if we say no, is a bid for connection. I think some ways to invite in a careful way are..

‘I’d love to go with you to this if you want to.’

‘I’m a part of this group that I have really found healing. Would you like to join me?’ “

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“I was invited by a friend who had not had a loss but heard about it at church and invited me to go. She invited and attended with me the first time. I am so thankful she did. It would have been difficult to go on my own the first time.”

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“I was invited by a friend who has never had a loss or gone to Gathering Hope. She heard about it from her midwife who had gone the year before. Here’s her text:

‘Hey! I am sharing this with you because you've been on my mind a lot recently. I hope I don't come across as insensitive in any way. One of our midwives recommended this event. She has been attending it for three years and spoke of the healing it brought her. I thought you may want the info.’ “

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“I found it after my mom saw about the event on tv last year. I have invited a lot of people. I just say ‘Hey I found this amazing community of other loss moms. We hold each other up and support each other through this.’ “

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“My friend at Crossfit told me. She knew I had lost a baby but didn’t know my story. She just told me she had something to share with me and hoped she wasn’t overstepping any boundaries. She told me a bit about Gathering Hope, when it was, and I dug into it more on my own. I am forever grateful for her willingness to share!”

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“ [A friend] invited me after I had my first miscarriage. I was a little skeptical about it at first. It would be both our first time attending. I think her comforting approach and being open to talking about our babies made me consider going. Others around me didn’t understand and wanted me to get over it but she understood. So, I suggest you ask someone in a very comforting and loving way. Let them know it’s okay to talk about their loss and there are so many other women out their ready to hear your story and be there for you.”

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“Hearing you be so open, honest and raw about your son touched my heart so deeply. I just knew I needed to be apart of this. I've had three losses...I never really felt like it was okay to talk about my losses in such an open way until I saw you doing it. At a birthday party. In front of friends and strangers.”

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“I randomly saw Peyton sharing her story on the news leading up to the event last year. But if someone had said ‘Hey there is this event/group you should check out’, I don’t think I would have been offended. I was drowning in grief and had no support system and no experience so it would have been a welcome invitation...Ultimately all you can do is make the invitation and put the ball in their court. Let it be up to her to whether this is something she needs right now. Maybe just say, ‘Would you like to go with me to this event in October?’ “

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“I was invited by my friend whose daughter had a loss. She told me she heard about this ‘conference thing’ and thought of me because she knew I had lost babies too. What made me more comfortable was that she said ‘Would you like to COME WITH US?’ and that made me feel like I didn’t have to consider going alone. I still took a few weeks deciding if I wanted to go or not but I’m pretty sure I would not have gone had I not been asked to come along with someone else.”

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I heard about GH from [a friend]. She was the first person I had talked to that truly understood my grief and loss. She was so vulnerable and open in sharing her story with me that it truly is the reason why I am willing to be the same. I have had so many friends message me about their friend that lost a baby and if I would be willing to talk to them. It really is one of the biggest blessings out of all of this to meet a mom exactly where she met me... at the beginning of their grief when you can feel so alone and unsure if your feelings are valid or crazy. To be able to connect to moms that truly understand each other’s pain is so important. [She] told me about Gathering Hope right away and explained how it would be a good place to get involved and find support. Connecting with the community that GH provides, it was a natural ‘next step’ for me to attend the event.”

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“It was through Facebook posts from Peyton that I learned about the GH event in 2017; the year I had my miscarriage. Encouraging posts played a part in getting me to that event October ‘17. FB & IG posts will get seen and read and that might be what someone in need might need to see at that very moment. I’m praying God uses whatever means to reach mommas in need of Hope.”

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Here’s what stands out to us:

1. People. Being personally invited to go, and being willing to attend alongside a grieving mother is powerful. (As a gentle reminder, Gathering Hope attendance is for women only.)

2. Vulnerability. If you’ve experienced the loss of a baby, being open about it allows others to see that it’s ok to seek support.

3. Timing. It’s not too soon and it’s not too late to invite someone to come to Gathering Hope. We have moms who attend with fresh grief, alongside those who miss a baby that they lost years ago.

Pray for gentle boldness in sharing this community with a mom that you love. Call her. Text her. Invite her to lunch. Talk with her after a workout, after church or walking to the parking lot after work. The Lord will provide the words or simply choose something you’ve read here. For more information or to attend a gathering, head to our website, GatheringHope.net. You can do it! 💜

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